Holy Cow! What a Great Breakfast!

  by Jess  |     October 9th, 2010   |    1View Comments

One of the greatest trips I’ve taken (thus far) was to a uber-fabulous resort deep in the heart of Kenya. I stayed at Ol Donyo Wuas Safari Lodge which was part of an Exclusive Resorts “once in a lifetime” trip … and it was.

This was my very own plunge pool. Kenya dig it? Thought so!

The resort was on 270,000 acres of private reserve. So when I was told that we were going to leave the lodge for breakfast I thought “Geeez – Starbucks really is EVERYWHERE!”.

Little did I know my breakfast – a white-linen-tablecloth-cooked-to-order-champagne-breakfast would be served up on the wide open savannah of the Mbirikani Maasai Group Ranch in southeast Kenya.

Literally right in the middle of nowhere.

And just this side of fabulous.

Breakfast al fresco on the Savannah

The poetry of a lone tree above a table eloquently dressed in fine china and linens.

Flie this one under amazing. IHoP will never be the same

A soft breeze in the air.

Lone Zebra in the distance.

Lone Zebra

And distinct moaning. Very distinct moaning and groaning.

Loud and lots of it.

Well … here – you listen for yourself.

So our beautiful remote breakfast – seemingly in the middle of nowhere was actually very much in the middle of somewhere. In the path of a local herder moving his flock to – uh – greener pastures. Or so we thought. Come to find out this heard of beef was hightailing it towards our breakfast. I thought it would be a lion or rogue elephant that would have me running for Kenya cover. Oh no – on this African safari it was a bunch of heffers. Kind of reminds me of this time I was about to get my tush handed to me outside of a scrap-booking convention.

Rogue Elephant (Sarah Palin never looked so good)

Anyhoo – I digress. Where were we. Oh yeah – so 100 plus head of cattle stampeding toward us. And literally there was nowhere to run. Nowhere to hide – because we were already under the only substantial tree around. Evidently these cows wanted to know more than just “what’s for dinner”.  Turns out they wanted water. Yep. H2O. These cows know that when they see a truck there is a good chance water is inside. It’s the same magical draw the ice cream truck has on a 7 year old.

But we were all out of rocket pops, so to speak.  And I can hardly call myself a ranch hand. 100 thirsty cows headed our way and not a clue what to do. Reason #957 of why you should have a guide with you while on Safari.

These cows may have been thirsty, but they were slow.  So with the help of dogs and distraction the cows were easily moooooved into a different direction.

Danger averted.

Breakfast ordered.

(Pun appropriately placed)

This breakfast was utterly amazing!

What did I order? More cow bell, of course.

Tags: Africa, Food, Kenya, Luxury

One Comment → “Holy Cow! What a Great Breakfast!”

  1. Bottomless

    2 months ago


    Muy parece.

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